Broke-Ass Movie

So, I don't know if it's the fact that I started watching the film an hour in or if, perhaps, it was that I watched the for-TV version and missed all the good drama.  Regardless, there was too much drama for me and I find it disgusting that it was applauded.  I'm talking about Brokeback Mountain...  the story of two terrible fathers, both very absent and/or abusive to their children and both with their over-used vice of choice.  In one scene, Ennis Del Mar (Heath Ledger), yells at his daughters and kicks the house after his wife cuts short his trip to see Jack Twist (Jake Gyllenhaal).  There are also many scenes of Ennis sitting around his house (drunk) and yelling with his wife in front of their two daughters.  Jack likes to pour himself into his work and is also (as he later confesses to Ennis) sleeping around on his wife.  Beyond their being often-times absent to their children, these men are horrible to their families when they're there.  Later, after Ennis and his wife have gotten divorced, they seem civil enough.  However, after a Christmas dinner with her and her new husband, Ennis's ex-wife presses him about a private area of his life and he gets abusive with her.  The movie ends for Jack Twist by being beaten to death after he is discovered to be sleeping with another man's wife.  For Ennis, who would never hold a job to support his children, the end is (for me, at least) unsympathetic in a trailer park, having begrudgingly agreed to attend his eldest daughter's wedding. 
I don't know about you, but I find it very hard to sympathize with two self-involved men who have no respect for their wives or children.  One of them can't hold a job, both are horrible parents, and both are alcoholics. 
Sympathy does not grow strong men.  A constant vigil on what is strong, selfless, loyal, and responsible is what makes a hero a hero.  These attributes, and many more that may well be respected, have all escaped our main characters here.  I will trade controversy for a respectable film any day of the week. 

Prostitution.

I just finished watching a very interesting 20/20 on prostitution in America.  I say very interesting, because it was just that.  I had no idea the depth and breadth of the problem our country is facing.  They went to the outskirts of Philadelphia for a portion of it and I couldn't help recalling the music video for "Streets of Philadelphia" (Bruce Springstein folks, come on).  It was seriously a ghost town with abandoned buildings occupied by homeless prostitutes.  During this portion of the program, the woman being interviewed actually left a couple of times to go see a "regular" (it seems cheesy to say "to see a 'regular'", but that's how she put it, sorry).  Anyhow, those interviewed also ranged up to women that have a select five or so clients and live very high end.  One woman being interviewed said that she saw this as no different than marrying for money.

This is where this blog really begins.  This woman got me thinking.  With this comparison, she stepped very close to a thin moral line...  from both directions.  Marry for money or stay single and have sex for money.  She saw no difference...  and honestly, disregarding my personal beliefs, I couldn't tell her there was a difference.  And so, I pose my first question to you, my reader:  What is the difference?
Please ponder that in depth before continuing on.

Without delay:  Why are you of that opinion?

"I don't know" is an entirely unacceptable answer.  I'm reminded of a 'Law and Order' episode where the fem fatale was constantly pushing the blame around.  It's not because so-and-so tells you it's right or wrong.  That makes no sense, because then the answer is dependent on the one instructing you of right and wrong. 

Okay, you've argued your way into the common place theme of well, "What's the social standard?".  And you can't truly rely on societies standards.  Don't tell me that you can.  They change continuously.  And it's all about entropy. 

Some other women would say oh, but I won't do _____.  So prostitution is one line and _____  was something completely different all together.  And Joe and Susie Televisionviewer are thinking something different all-together about these women.

Where do we start and where do we begin?  Who decides this moral standard?  Look in text books on social work or whatever you like.  The opinions are greatly varied.  You should all see what I'm getting at. 

The atheists and agnostics will be rolling their eyes, but with little to say that might hold substance.

There is a moral standard set for us.  Look to that for your answers.

Indiscernible

This blog was originally started on February 14, 2008

So tonight at Core-munity, we were posed with the thought of where we've seen Jesus in our lives (following a discussion on the whole Matthew 16 "who is Jesus?" theme).  Anyhow, I got to thinking about the faces that had once reminded me of our dear saviour.  I realized that many of those friends, family, and church members that once so strongly mirrored Jesus to my life no longer did so.  This is my argument for a single constant:  God.

Abortion

Quick blog on abortion with a website plug at the end.

1) Those that cut themselves. 2) Those practicing bulimia/anorexia. 3) Nudists. 4) Suicide. 5) Drug addicts. 6) Absent fathers.

Their lives, their choices. Correct? Just because it's your body or your life doesn't make every action you choose to take with it the right one. Please, don't pick my list of 6 completely apart. I don't expect you to find all six of them completely repulsive. I was going for diversity. Most people will probably find at least one of the above to be morally wrong on some level, irregardless of your personal moral stance (or stances). Please also note that not one of the six involves harm being done to another person. And so, I grant everyone the rights to their own body.

Think about this list. Think about abortion. Please also visit www.Abort73.com (Graphic content warning... though, only if you get yourself into it). Please, end your own ignorance.

Consider the list and consider the website.

Goodnight.

Real Fear

Okay, so it's been forever since I blogged... but I like to think that, while my blogs are few and far between, my blogs are well thought out and worth reading. So, anyhow, I got to thinking at our core group this past Thursday night about serious respect for the Cross. I got to thinking, while we were taking communion, about how I, as most of us probably do, often forget the serious commitment taken up by Jesus on the Cross. I often find myself not really thinking thru and fully appreciating the sacrifice made for us all. Often, I kind of process it thinking about, well yeah, you're really God... I mean, I totally appreciate your sacrifice for me to, but didn't you have this all planned out from the beginning? And the answer is yes, but I often forget that Jesus was just a man. He was a man that prayed to God, asking if he really had to go thru with this. He was a man that, as he hung there dying, cried out to God, asking why he had been forsaken. For as Jesus was fully man, he certainly appeared to be out of the loop on the entire plan. And so, it was definitely not something that was just going thru the motions; it was indeed a man listening to God because of His love for the world. Anyhow, just something I need to occassionally remind myself of that I thought I'd share.

Necessary Reading

I think that all Christians concerned with getting the most of God's word need to read Daniel's blog from 15 November 2006 titled "Satan Hits a Homerun!". Click 'Daniel H' on the left under my friends list to get to his blog.

Resolution.

Okay, I've found something to blog about.  It hit me last night that a lot of the anxiety and worry in my life comes from my nonresponse to things I avoid or just really don't want to take care of.  i.e., I really don't like talking on the phone outside of the quick, "yeah, I'm on my way, see you in a few" or something like that.  So, I avoid returning calls.  This ends up just making me feel like, "oh, I need to return so-andso's call" all the time.  And similarly, I avoid other tasks that I find boring, like writing my Thank You notes from the wedding (which I am finally working on).  So there gets to be a lot of stuff like this that I just avoid and inadvertently bring anxiety and stress on myself.  Anyhow, part of my phone avoidance is, of course, my family (because it's not you, it's the phone...  really) and I haven't called some of my extended family in a long time; though, last night, I found that I felt pretty good after chatting online with my uncle for about an hour.  And so, what I've been leading up to is the resolution that I feel much better if I just take care of business and get it off of my back (brilliant, I know).  However, what I mean to get at is the slightly more abstract idea that you're more comfortable playing towards resolution rather than trying to stay in your comfort zone.  So why is it a comfort zone.  I don't know, I'm just trying to blog here.  Find your resolution zone and you'll find your comfort zone, but a comfort zone is not meant to relax in.

The Posts You've Been Looking-Out For.

1) The Baby.
Okay, as for a post on the baby, yes, Kippy and I are pregnant.  It was unexpected, but we're totally stoked about it.  All my life, despite having a pitiful excuse for a father myself, everyone's always said that I'm going to make a great father.  So, I'm pretty excited to have my time to shine finally arrive.  I think I will make an incredible father (not to pat myself on the back, but that's exactly what I'd like to do).  Despite my relaxed attitude towards absolutely everything else in my life, I will take this very seriously.  This is not a false promise, but more of an absolute gut feeling that raising strong children is something that God meant for me to do.  I feel like this is part of my calling.  Anyhow, we are indeed very excited about being parents and I'm totally looking forward to everything involved.
2) Being the spiritual leader of my family.
Simply put, this is something that I just need to suck it up on and take charge of.  I don't like to pray out loud...  at all.  However, I need to get past this as part of being the spiritual leader of my family.  Part of what I also need to focus on is reading and memorizing scripture.  I used to do this more as a young Christian, but not so much anymore.  Anyhow, our Core group talked about this last night and mainly focused on how to easily memorize scripture; namely, via visualization.  This is something I used to do a lot for not just scripture memorization, but for anything I needed to remember.  So, this really inspired me to get back on my horse with reading the Bible and working harder to memorize it.  One thing that really hit me was that, last night, one of the big point Ian made was that (or something like this), "you live what you know."  Anyhow, I just got to thinking that it would be a major support in my life to be able to recall scripture, not just for those I may be talking with, but to more easily keep myself in check through reminding myself of God's word.  Anyhow, that's something for me to work on.
3) How I relate to those around me.
I find it hard to create stronger relationships as of late.  I was discussing this with Daniel before I left the office yesterday too, and he seemed to have very similar views.  Anyhow, I find that in post-college life, people are less apt to make close relationships by simply being close.  Everyone seems to feel like you need to get close to be close, rather than being close to stay close...  or something like that.  The way that I've always related to my closest friends is that we've just clicked.  I feel like I just click with a lot of people too, but I feel like most people would find it strange if you were to just call them up and say, "Hey, let's go hang out" and the two of you just went and hung out.  I feel like most people would be in anticipation of something rather than just being like, oh cool, we'll just hang out.  Anyhow, I don't think that you can ever be really good friends with someone if you're "waiting to grow closer as friends".  If you want to have strong friendships, you just need to let it fly and be close friends from one.
4) The possibility of a tattoo.
Plain and simple...  I really want one.  However, I'm incredibly particular about pretty much everything, so I only want a tattoo of my own art.  Again, I'm incredibly meticulous, so I will probably never get around to sitting down to draw-up my perfect design.  However, it is certainly a goal for someday.

Posts to Lookout for...

Posts to expect from me very soon...

- One on the baby.
- One on my being the spiritual leader of my family.
- One on how I relate to those around me.
- Maybe one on my (AGAIN) pondering the possibility of a tattoo.

...stay tuned.

Sounds like memory loss.

So, Daniel had the suggestion today that I stop listening to such angry music all the time (i.e., 102.1 and 101.1), as I've been playing it in my office.  Anyhow, he caught some dirty lyrics that I'd never paid attention to before.  I told him I never really paid attention to them, so he asked what I thought about when I listened to music and I was all, "I dunno, I guess I just think".  So, he suggested that maybe my horrible short-term memory was a result of this. 

 

I had to admit that my work day (and my memory) seemed better on the days that I didn't listen to anything on the way to work.  I think there is probably some connection here, so Daniel and I decided to make me a guinea pig.  I'm going to (sometime) stop listening to music outside of church and core...  or at least cut out my poorly influenced choice of riding and working music.  We'll see what this does for my memory, as well as my attitude, which Daniel seems to think will be affected as well. 

 

Am I biased about this experiment?  Yes, it'll be hard to be impartial, but keep posted for blog'd updates on all of this (whenever I decide to start).

Murder on W. Main

Okay, so I've been at our Richmond office this week doing some work for our VCU contract. It's been sweet... a 15 minute, 8 mile drive to work is absolutely do-able. Plus, Ray (the Project General Manager here) is willing to let me handle my own jobs... so it's pretty sweet to be given some more responsibilities. Also, I get along really well with him and everyone else in the office and just feel more secure here on the whole. So, Tuesday started out as an incredibly fantastically sweet day when Ray informed me that he was going to be pushing our area VP to let him keep me here, a topic which will have to be cleared with myself and my home office PGM @ Fort Lee. I'm all for it, not only because of the close proximity to home and the hour of driving time I regain for more productivity in my social life, but also for the fact that Ray's willing to let me do exactly what I was wanting to do. I had only recently discussed with a coworker how I would like to, someday, be my own Project Manager/Superintendent (as opposed to the set-up of PM in the office to estimate/schedule a job and a job Superintendent to run things in the field). Well, Ray has the idea in his head to get a few good men (myself being one of them :-) ) and give each of us like two larger jobs and a few smaller ones and we can run both the office and the field ends of jobs on our own (i.e., without a separate PM or Superintendent). So, I'm totally stoked about this and will probably be hearing from both my VP and PGM later this week or early the next to fill them in on my thoughts of the office/position switch. Anyhow, that was Tuesday morning. While on this high Tuesday afternoon, I parallel in front of the office, consider moving the vehicle so my tire isn't on the sidewalk, decide not to, open my door to get out, and bam... a chick on a bike totally slams into my door. Luckily, she assured me she was okay and just rode her bike away. However, she did manage to do almost 1,400 dollars worth of damage to my door, which no longer opened. Being the relaxed guy that I am, I didn't much mind and just kind of dealt with it (plus, I've got pretty good auto insurance... which is giving me a new Grand Cherokee to drive until they fix the Xterra, which will be about a week). So the moral of the story is that you should just stay chill and work with things. Go with the flow, cause come on, it's kind of weird/funny to have someone on a bike run into your door. Plus, for the five years that we've had this VCU contract, that's the first time it's happened to any of us... and considering we're just blocks from Carytown, it's pretty weird. Anyhow, here's to hoping I can keep that extra hour of my day.

What to do, what to do.

So, earlier today (about 30 mins. ago), when I was walking the dog, I got to thinking about all the crap that I have to do at work tomorrow (i.e., picking up the slack for one of our slack superintendents).  And I got thinking about how some people have sweet jobs where they always get to do what they love and things are pretty cake (granted, I'm sure there's always headaches).  Anyhow, I just got wondering why I'm not doing that.  Don't get me wrong, I love my job and I really enjoy almost everyone I work with, but it kills me to have to pick-up after this guy that's had a project for two weeks and hasn't even looked at the job.  So now, I have to try to find a mason to do the work super-cheap.  Like I say, I love my work, but it seems that so far all I've been doing is helping to clean-up other people's messes.  I suppose this is a good thing to be known to be able to do, but we'll see what kind of recognition comes of it.  Anyways, back to the moral of the story...  I'd really like to be able to have my own company and be able to do whatever the crap I wanted to, but then again, there's the whole thing about getting it kicked off and not having a vacation for like three years.  Plus, it's always just risky as all get out. 
On another note, I've also wondered if I wouldn't enjoy a slight career change and get into the design end of Civil Engineering.  I pretty sure I'd like it a lot, but I also have no experience doing any sort of structural design work...  but I could pick it up easy enough.  But that's all I can think to write about for now and as in my previous blog, I'd better get back to helping my wife with house chores before I get murdered.

A Work In Progress

Yes, I know, none of my links or friend links work properly, but I'm working on it.  For now, it's back to house chores before my wife kills me.

The Second Blog: Numero Two

I know, it's doce.  I just wanted to recommend Gnarls Barkley's album St. Elsewhere to everyone.  Plus, I'm testing the post via email feature.

--
Men work together, I told him from the heart,
Whether they work together or apart.
- from The Tuft of Flowers by Robert Frost

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth.
- II Timothy 2:15

Numero Uno

This is just a lame post to have a post. I know, lame.